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>A truly Canadian Apology to the USA... Courtesy of Rick Mercer from
>This Hour Has 22 Minutes, CBC Television:
>
>On behalf of Canadians everywhere I'd like to offer an apology to
>the United States of America. We haven't been getting along very well
>recently and for that, I am truly sorry. I'm sorry we called George
>Bush a
>moron. He is a moron but, it wasn't nice of us to point it out. If
>it's any
>consolation, the fact that he's a moron shouldn't reflect poorly on
>the
>people of America. After all it's not like you actually
>elected him.
>
>I'm sorry about our softwood lumber. Just because we have more trees
>than you doesn't give us the right to sell you lumber that's cheaper
>and
>better than your own.
>
>I'm sorry we beat you in Olympic hockey. In our defence I guess our
>excuse would be that our team was much, much, much, much better than
>yours.
>
>I'm sorry we burnt down your White House during the war of 1812. I
>notice you've rebuilt it! It's Very Nice.
>
>I'm sorry about your beer. I know we had nothing to do with your beer
>but, we feel your pain.
>
>I'm sorry about our waffling on Iraq. I mean, when you're going up
>against a crazed dictator, you want to have your friends by your side.
>I realize it took more than two years before you guys pitched in
>against Hitler, but that was different. Everyone knew he had weapons.
>
>And finally on behalf of all Canadians, I'm sorry that we're
>constantly
>apologizing for things in a passive-aggressive way which is really
>a thinly veiled criticism. I sincerely hope that you're not upset
>over this. We've seen what you do to countries you get upset with."
>This Hour Has 22 Minutes, CBC Television:
>
>On behalf of Canadians everywhere I'd like to offer an apology to
>the United States of America. We haven't been getting along very well
>recently and for that, I am truly sorry. I'm sorry we called George
>Bush a
>moron. He is a moron but, it wasn't nice of us to point it out. If
>it's any
>consolation, the fact that he's a moron shouldn't reflect poorly on
>the
>people of America. After all it's not like you actually
>elected him.
>
>I'm sorry about our softwood lumber. Just because we have more trees
>than you doesn't give us the right to sell you lumber that's cheaper
>and
>better than your own.
>
>I'm sorry we beat you in Olympic hockey. In our defence I guess our
>excuse would be that our team was much, much, much, much better than
>yours.
>
>I'm sorry we burnt down your White House during the war of 1812. I
>notice you've rebuilt it! It's Very Nice.
>
>I'm sorry about your beer. I know we had nothing to do with your beer
>but, we feel your pain.
>
>I'm sorry about our waffling on Iraq. I mean, when you're going up
>against a crazed dictator, you want to have your friends by your side.
>I realize it took more than two years before you guys pitched in
>against Hitler, but that was different. Everyone knew he had weapons.
>
>And finally on behalf of all Canadians, I'm sorry that we're
>constantly
>apologizing for things in a passive-aggressive way which is really
>a thinly veiled criticism. I sincerely hope that you're not upset
>over this. We've seen what you do to countries you get upset with."
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