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Hell
Question: Is Hell exothermic (gives off heat) or
endothermic (absorbs heat)?
Most of the students wrote proofs of their beliefs using
Boyle's Law (gas cools when it expands and heats when it is compressed)
or some variant.
One student, however, wrote the following:
First, we need to know how the Mass of Hell is changing in
time.
So we need to know the rate at which souls are moving into
Hell and the rate at which they are leaving.
I think that we can safely assume that once a soul gets to
Hell, it will not leave. Therefore, no souls are leaving.
As for how many souls are entering Hell, let's look at the
different Religions that exist in the world today. Most of these
religions state that if you are not a member of their religion, you will go
to Hell.
Since there is more than one of these religions and since
people do not belong to more than one religion, we can project that all
souls go to Hell.
With birth and death rates as they are, we can expect the
number of souls in Hell to increase exponentially.
Now, we look at the rate of change of the volume in Hell
because Boyle's Law states that in order for the temperature and pressure in
Hell to stay the same, the volume of Hell has to expand proportionately as souls are added.
This gives two possibilities:
1. If Hell is expanding at a slower rate than the rate at
which souls enter Hell, then the temperature and pressure in Hell will
increase until all Hell breaks loose.
2. If Hell is expanding at a rate faster than the increase
of souls in Hell, then the temperature and pressure will drop until
Hell freezes over.
So which is it?
If we accept the postulate given to me by Teresa during my
Freshman year that, "It will be a cold day in Hell before I sleep with
you", and take into account the fact that I slept with her last night,
then the number 2 postulate must be true, and thus I am sure that Hell is exothermic
and has already frozen over.
The corollary of this theory is that---since Hell has
frozen over, it follows that it is not accepting any more souls and is
therefore, extinct...leaving only Heaven, thereby proving the
existence of a divine being, which explains why, last night, Teresa kept shouting
"Oh my God."
endothermic (absorbs heat)?
Most of the students wrote proofs of their beliefs using
Boyle's Law (gas cools when it expands and heats when it is compressed)
or some variant.
One student, however, wrote the following:
First, we need to know how the Mass of Hell is changing in
time.
So we need to know the rate at which souls are moving into
Hell and the rate at which they are leaving.
I think that we can safely assume that once a soul gets to
Hell, it will not leave. Therefore, no souls are leaving.
As for how many souls are entering Hell, let's look at the
different Religions that exist in the world today. Most of these
religions state that if you are not a member of their religion, you will go
to Hell.
Since there is more than one of these religions and since
people do not belong to more than one religion, we can project that all
souls go to Hell.
With birth and death rates as they are, we can expect the
number of souls in Hell to increase exponentially.
Now, we look at the rate of change of the volume in Hell
because Boyle's Law states that in order for the temperature and pressure in
Hell to stay the same, the volume of Hell has to expand proportionately as souls are added.
This gives two possibilities:
1. If Hell is expanding at a slower rate than the rate at
which souls enter Hell, then the temperature and pressure in Hell will
increase until all Hell breaks loose.
2. If Hell is expanding at a rate faster than the increase
of souls in Hell, then the temperature and pressure will drop until
Hell freezes over.
So which is it?
If we accept the postulate given to me by Teresa during my
Freshman year that, "It will be a cold day in Hell before I sleep with
you", and take into account the fact that I slept with her last night,
then the number 2 postulate must be true, and thus I am sure that Hell is exothermic
and has already frozen over.
The corollary of this theory is that---since Hell has
frozen over, it follows that it is not accepting any more souls and is
therefore, extinct...leaving only Heaven, thereby proving the
existence of a divine being, which explains why, last night, Teresa kept shouting
"Oh my God."
must have missed it as i had a habit of deleting anything more then 3 4 lines 
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